5 Tips For Managing Conflict With Your Partner
Relationships can be one of the most fulfilling parts of our lives, and they can also be one of the most challenging. When two people come together, they bring with them their own unique perspectives, opinions, and preferences. While this can be a beautiful thing, it can also lead to disagreements and conflict at times. Whether it's about big decisions like where to live or small ones like who forgot to take out the trash, conflict is a natural part of any partnership and impossible to avoid altogether. However, there are many ways to manage it effectively in order to reduce the negative impact it has on your relationship.
The Importance Of Conflict Resolution in Relationships
Learning how to manage conflict with your partner is an essential skill that not only helps couples navigate disagreements but also provides them with an opportunity to build a stronger connection and gain a deeper understanding of one another. That being said, managing conflict with your partner can be challenging, especially when emotions are high and both parties are feeling frustrated or hurt. In the heat of the moment, it's easy to say or do things that you may regret later, which can escalate the situation and potentially damage the relationship.
Effective conflict resolution requires self-awareness, emotional intelligence, and a willingness to compromise and work towards a resolution that benefits both partners. It's not about avoiding conflicts altogether, but rather about learning how to communicate effectively, listen actively, and find solutions that meet both partners' needs.
5 Tips For Managing Conflict With Your Partner
Next time you and your partner are experiencing conflict, consider these 5 tips to help you work through and resolve the situation in a healthy and productive manner!
1) Use ‘I’ Statements To Communicate How You Feel
Effective communication is key to healthy relationships because it allows couples to build trust, understanding, and mutual respect for one another. Next time you’re telling your partner how you feel about something, try using ‘I’ statements to communicate your feelings in a compassionate way and avoid shifting blame or accusation onto your partner. For example, instead of saying “You make me feel upset when you forget to call me,” try saying, “I feel upset when you forget to call me when you’re running late because it makes it hard for me to time dinner and plan accordingly for the kids' activities.”
2) Soften the Start Of Your Conversation
The beginning of your conversation sets the tone for how the rest of it will go! If you approach the conversation with an accusatory or hostile tone, it’s likely that your partner will become defensive and the conversation will escalate quickly. Instead, try to soften the start of the conversation with a compliment or by expressing your appreciation for your partner before diving into the issue at hand. This can help put your partner at ease and make them more receptive to what you are saying.
3) Take a Break If Things Get Too Heated
When emotions are running high, it can be difficult to have a productive and healthy conversation. In these situations, taking a 10-15 minute break can be helpful and give you and your partner a chance to reset. During this break, try to avoid thinking about the conflict itself and instead use this time to calm your mind by engaging in a relaxing activity like yoga, deep breathing, or other grounding exercises. Once you feel calmer, come back to the conversation and try to approach it with a clearer mind.
4) Be Willing To Compromise With Your Partner
Compromise is a vital component of any healthy relationship. When conflicts arise, it is important to be willing to listen to your partner's perspective and be open to finding a solution that works for both of you. Remember that finding a compromise doesn't mean that one person has to sacrifice their needs or desires. Instead, it is about finding a solution that works for both partners.
5) Seek additional support from a licensed therapist
Sometimes, despite your best efforts, managing conflict in your relationship can be difficult. In these situations, it can be helpful to seek additional support from a licensed therapist. Therapy can provide a safe and neutral space for you and your partner to work through conflicts and strengthen your relationship alongside the help of a trained professional.
Couples Therapy In Kansas & Missouri
If you and your partner are struggling to navigate conflict in a healthy way, please reach out for additional support by calling 913.735.9226 or emailing me at shannon@newnarrativetherapy.org.
It’s time to work together to get you and your partner back on the same team!
